WIP – Revising Scenes 34 and 35



Scenes 34 and 35

I revised scenes 32 and 33.


I just finished Part Two.

Time to step back, take a deep breath, and be amazed.

 Scene 34 (May 22nd)

I broke Scene 34, as originally planned, into two scenes.  I wrote Scene 34, Scene 34A, and Scene 35, as close together as I could.  My MC was POV in all of them.  And this was her chance to show off her qualities.  I’m proud of her.

I wrote Scene 34 as dramatic.  Dramatic scenes require difficult choices, and lots of emotion in arriving at them.  I force her to make a hard, hard choice.  The hardest choice a mother would ever have to make.

I wrote Scene 34A as suspense.  Once she starts, she cannot go back, but has to finish what she started.  And she must run toward what she hopes is her second worst enemy.  Does it work?  I hope so.
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WIP – Revising Scenes 32 and 33



Scenes 32 and 33

I revised scenes 30 and 31.


I’m finally nearing the end of Part Two.  Back with my main character, I tackled two scenes that I had earmarked to be collection points for several original scenes.  And…I changed my mind, and turned those two scenes into five scenes.  Happily, I had words to spare.

 Scene 32 (May 16th)

Scene 32 became two scenes.  When I originally wrote about this, I had three scenes.  I took part of one original scene and moved it to Scene 33, and then wrote 32 and 32A.  I made this division because I needed two different scene types.  I needed action, a battle scene, and I needed something which presaged it.  And I decided on suspense.

Scene 32 became a suspense scene.  I spent a lot of time on this scene.  My MC is still reacting to her husband’s death, as well as her father’s.  My worry was that she would come off whiny.  And, maybe she does, but I try to make of for that in my next scene.

Scene 32A became an action scene.  And I followed Rosenfeld’s suggestion, and quickly stripped away almost all inner thoughts and emotions.  I let her react like a tigress defending her son.  And, I think, she comes off as powerful and driven.  She is successful in this fight, not because she is a kick-ass guy with boobs.  She is successful because she is highly proficient with a bow.  And, by using it, she is able to negate strength and speed that men have over her.  I was proud of her.

One thing I want to go back and look at is the fight sequence itself.  I think I fell into too much of a pattern with three and four line paragraphs.  One after another, after another.  If I stick in some odd speaking here and there, and allow her a few thoughts now and then, I think those regular steps of paragraphs will dissolve into random sizes, with incomplete sentences and hanging whatevers.

I will tackle that next time

 Scene 33 (May 20th)

Scene 33 became three scenes.  I took some of the ideas I’d not used in Scene 32 and moved them into the Scene 33 bucket.  And then I went to work, making Scene 33 dramatic, Scene 34 suspense, and Scene 35 dialog.

Scene 33 became dramatic.  Her reaction to battle, and having killed someone for the first time, was perfect.  Mix that emotion in with anger in her grieving process, and she takes it out on people who may not deserve it.  But she is furious at having been put in peril and having to defend her son in a situation which very nearly ended in disaster.  I hope readers see her anger as justified.

Scene 33A became suspense.  Even though they had won their battle, they are still in grave danger.  And, at the end of the scene, the enemy discovers them, and people have to make sacrifices for her and her son to escape.

Scene 33B became dialog.  It was new.  For a mini-mystery in Part Three, I needed to plant some information.  So, one of my characters makes a trip none of us had planned.  And, later, one of my junior villains will say and do things which raise my characters suspicions.  But that is a tale for another scene.

How Am I Doing?

I have 33 of 74 scenes revised or rewritten.  I’m loath to admit I just added three scenes.  I will wait until I’m done to see how many I actually wind up with.  I reached 55,083 words.  I’m 1,358 words over my target.  But, since I’m now trying to hit 60,000 words, I think I will be very close.

Happy writing.

Read about Scenes 34 and 35.

WIP – Revising Scenes 30 and 31



Scenes 30 and 31

I revised scenes 28 and 29.


“Back in the saddle again…”

How come I can’t remember more of that old song than that.  I suppose I could YouTube it, but that would spoil it.

Oh, and not just cowboys climb up in that saddle to ride.  Ha.

 Scene 30 (May 11th)

Revising scene 30 challenged me.  I still had my original POV.  But, my original scene played heavily against what had happened in scene 29.  And, since scene 29 bore no resemblance to my first version, I had to change my focus.

Finding my focus didn’t take long.  Since I’d decided on drama this time, I needed to force my POV into some sort of painful decision.  He finds himself in circumstances that are spinning out of control.  And he finds himself relying on people he doesn’t like or trust very much.

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WIP – Revising Scenes 28 and 29



Scenes 28 and 29

I revised scenes 26 and 27.


Life got in my way.

After working all day, I was too tired at night to think straight.  And I couldn’t write.  Talk about a guilt trip.  Ha.

 Scene 28 (May 7th)

Revising scene 28 proved so difficult I almost gave up.  When I revised my plan, I reduced my POV’s from seven to four.  And, if I kept Scene 28, I needed to change POVs.  I also decided I wanted it to be dramatic, then dialog, then, finally, suspense.

As I approached this scene, I was more aware of scene types than I’ve ever been.  And I fixated on how to write a suspense scene.  Falling back on my normal approach to these things, I fiddled around, waiting for inspiration.  But it didn’t come.

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WIP – Revising Scenes 26 and 27



Scenes 26 and 27

I revised scenes 24 and 25.


I set aside my drama and kept pushing on.

My reward?  Two scenes in two days.

 Scene 26 (April 27th)

When I originally planned scenes 25 and 26, I knew I had timing issues.  I had moved things around and I was pretty sure things would not fit.  And they didn’t.

I ran into conflict between what I needed my scenes to do vs what the scene templates emphasized.  All that sounds vague.  But I needed my MC to make critical decisions in Scene 25.  She intellectually resisted her choices, but welcomed in her heart.  That meant I couldn’t introduce her future mentor.  So, that had to wait.

When I reached scene 26, I had intended to use drama, but I needed to get her mentor properly introduced.  So, I decided on dialog.  I got her introduced to him, and to readers, which I so wanted to do.  I also used reveals inherent within dialog scenes to spring yet another twist on her plans, placing her in greater dangers and no good place to turn to.  Perfect.
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WIP – Revising Scenes 24 and 25



Scenes 24 and 25

I revised scene 23.


Our car broke down.

We didn’t get very far

So I came home and went back to work

I found time to write, but I didn’t get nearly as much done as I might have.  It’s just that it’s so easy to find other things to do.

Some of them even without my computer.  Ha.

 Scene 24 (April 22nd)

Scene 24 was always going to be action.  And I thought it would be easy to write.


My problem was that I wanted a lot of build up to get into it.  I stripped down as much as I could, wishing I’d had another scene to help set this one up.  I spent 300 of my 1200 words before their knives came out.  I tried to pep up their dialog with barbs and verbal combat, letting it escalate into their knife fight.

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