WIP – Revising Scene Sixteen



Scene Sixteen

I revised scene fifteen.

23I have not been happy with the last four scenes I wrote.  I selected Action, Contemplative and Dialog structures.  How could I have gone through such a mood swing.

I slept on my unhappiness.  This morning, I had some thoughts.

I’m not really sure how well I followed Rosenfeld’s templates.  My two dialog scenes felt flat.  I forgot my formula of declaring my POV’s intentions going into scenes.  And I don’t feel as if I developed conflict very well.  So…if they seemed to have no point…they didn’t.

And…if they didn’t have any point…they didn’t have any conflict.  And if they didn’t have any conflict, why would anyone read them.

I also came to another realization.  And I wanted to cry.  After I revise my story, I won’t be ready to release my story to Beta Readers.








There.  I said it.  Now I can get on with my life

Scene Sixteen (April 9th)

Scene Sixteen existed my first draft, and was the only view readers had into my MC’s culture.  This time around, Scene Eight came earlier.  My intention was to ground her culture and her values.  I was far less pressured to offer clues on Native Americans…so I didn’t.

I designed my revised scene to comment on turmoil and threats her family faced.  I gave her a goal.  I foreshadowed problems with her People.  Then she quarrels with her Father about her future, which tied directly to her stated goal.  And my reveal had a direct impact on her stated wish and forced her to accept her father’s wish.  I feel better about my scene.

When I got through my next iteration, I will lay out Scenes Six and Twelve, and work on them together.  I think I have repetitive material which I will want to confine to just one or the other.

How Am I Doing?

I reached 21,436 words, 636 words over my target.  I hope that, when I compare Scenes Six and Twelve I will be able to get some of the words back.

Anyway…two more scenes to go in Part One.

Read about Scene Seventeen.

2 thoughts on “WIP – Revising Scene Sixteen

  1. Pingback: WIP – Revising Scene Seventeen | Simply Silent

  2. Pingback: WIP – Revising Scene Fifteen | Simply Silent

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