WIP – Revising Scenes 67 – 70



Scenes 67 -70

I revised scenes 61, 62, 64 and 66.


I’m back to writing scenes in order.

And the further I get from poor old scene 59, the more I wonder if I need it.

But…I will write it anyway.

Scene 67 (June 22nd)

I wrote Scene 67 as dramatic.

When I wrote my first draft, I still wasn’t completely sure how my MC could relate to her villain / love interest.  And this scene was almost a throw in, because I wanted her to dither about what she was going to do, before deciding what to do.

Instead, I was able to use another character to try to force her into accepting the villain / love interest back.  Only, this time, she is strong enough and motivated enough that she doesn’t even dream of it.

So, finally, I think I have her right.

Scene 68 (June 22nd)

I wrote Scene 68 as suspense.

My villain / love interest fights his last big battle of the war.  I do not feel I’m doing battles very well.  Since I’m writing in Third Limited Close, I cannot pan out like movies do, and show big movements and exciting charges and everyone hacking and cutting.  Instead, I can only write what my POV can experience with his senses.  I wrote this scene as episodic, something I’ve tended to steer clear of.  I’ve used indirect to bridge between my episodes.

In my battles, my POV has always been someone commanding an army.  What do they actually, physically do?  I can’t use the Star Trek model where Captain Kirk goes down on every away mission.  That’s not a General’s job.  They need to watch from their mountain top, and order men around.  So, that’s what I did.  And I’m wondering if I made everything too boring.

I considered some cardboard cutouts who could take part in battles, and treat their experiences as action scenes.  I seem to recall Shakespeare doing that with some of his minor characters in one of his Henry plays.  If I go through a really big revision, I might consider adding some cartoons to do this.  But that feels like cheating.

Scene 69 (June 23rd)

I wrote Scene 69 as Suspense.  And, again, I found myself doing episodes, three, all told from my MC’s POV.  Half my scene was new.  When I went to bed, I had no clue what I should do.  But, when I woke up, I had some pretty clear ideas.  I even brought back a minor minor minor character to help my MC.

With my original material, I had a significant challenge.  I kill another of the minor villains.  In my original draft, this scene happened at the end.  But, now, it happens before the climax.  So I needed to rewicker several things.

I suspect this will become three scenes when I parse things out.  But everything in 69 and 70 will be in the same chapter, I suspect.

Scene 70 (June 24th)

I wrote Scene 70 as dramatic.  My scene was entirely new.  But, it continued Scene 69.   I’ve set the stage her final confrontation with her villain / love interest.

How Am I Doing?

I have five scenes to go.  And nothing can stop me (I hope.)

I have 14,449 words down in Part Four, with 24,000 planned.  I’ve saved 551 words so far against my plan.  And my revised Part Four is 13,700 words smaller than my first draft.

I’m cautiously optimistic that I can fit Part Four into 24,000 words.  And, I think I will have reshaped into down to 120,000 words.

Read about Scenes 59 and 71-74.


2 thoughts on “WIP – Revising Scenes 67 – 70

  1. Pingback: WIP – Revising Scenes 59 and 71 – 74 | Simply Silent

  2. Pingback: WIP – Revising Scenes 61, 62, 64, 66 | Simply Silent

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